When you are struggling to reach your goals, and you truly believe you are giving your best, sometimes it can be a bitter pill to imagine that your own thoughts are what are standing in your way, right?
But hang with me, I think you may be able to get on board with this one if you’ll give me just a couple minutes. And if you can give me a couple minutes and an open mind, it could even change the game for you forever!
It’s hard to believe that you can be successful if you haven’t yet been successful. Or even worse, if you are like so many of us, and you make a couple steps forward towards your goals, only to somehow fall off the path and slip-and-slide backwards. Sometimes we take two steps forward, one step back, or sometimes we slip so far we lose sight of how we ever were on track to begin with.
This can apply to any area of our lives as busy moms, of course.
It can be the habit of getting up early to get the workout in before the first “Mom?” is heard. It can be planning meals and grocery trips ahead of time to avoid dreading the words, “What’s for dinner?” And we all know it can be about what we eat! Following a nutrition plan is hard work, with so much temptation, so much stress, so many distractions, so much busy-ness.
The truth is: we all slip. We all lose sight of our goals from time to time.
The successful just know how to get back on track.
The least effective thing you can do is to beat yourself up. If you want to guarantee you’ll continue to struggle, tell yourself you’re a failure. The quickest way to self-sabotage is dwelling on how you’re not measuring up. The quickest way to success? Empower yourself. Dust yourself off, pick yourself up, and recommit to you.
Success isn’t a one-and-done phenomenon. It is a series of habits, built and maintained over time. You don’t lose 20 pounds overnight, in one decision. You lose 20 pounds, or change any habit, through hundreds of decisions. So when you struggle, just know that you’re soon going to be presented with an opportunity to make a new decision that will contribute to the final say on whether or not you achieve your goals.
In other words: don’t throw your goals out with the bathwater, so to speak, all over one screw up.
Successful people let go, learn, and keep on keeping on. Unsuccessful people throw in the towel. Which do you want to be?
Or better yet: what kind of example do you want to set for your children?
The next time you slip (and there will be a next time, for you and for me), no matter which happy healthy habit it affects, consider trying the following. These principals can be easily applied to your connections (oops, forgot to check in with your mom as you’d planned), your fitness (yeah, hit the snooze button again!), your time management, to any area of your wellness! Give it a try.
- Notice it, without judgment. Let go of the natural instinct to criticize yourself. Let go of the natural instinct to ask, “Why?” Just notice it. You ate more chocolate than intended. You skipped a workout. You blew off coffee with a dear friend because you weren’t on top of your schedule. It happened.
- Tell yourself, “I can’t go back. I can only learn and go forward.” This is a huge shift for a lot of us! Instead of beating yourself up, treat yourself like you’d treat your best friend. You’d tell her to not be so hard on herself, right? You are just as important and just as valuable. Give yourself that same love.
- Only after you’ve done the first two, begin to troubleshoot and make a plan to get back on track. Ultimately, if you have treated yourself well, you’ve committed to growing and learning, this is the easy and exciting part. You get to start again, you get to learn, you get another chance!
What would happen if you tried this the next time you slip? How might things look different? I’d love to hear your story, comment below!